QUESTION:
Dear Oracle,
I would
like to know if the one I have loved for many years is
returning to me. Many things, and our own insecurities broke
us apart, and if not this one, will someone else come soon
to make life start again for me?
Sarah
ANSWER:
Sarah,
Life is
an individual journey we all take among a sea of people.
People come in and out of our lives, playing different roles
as we journey on our paths. We often share the same path
with a partner, but not always. I understand that you are
feeling sad and lonely, but in order to keep your
insecurities from ending the next relationship, you need to
heal the part of self that is insecure and feels that life
has stopped for you.
Your
insecurities have kept you from being true to your Authentic
Self. They also perpetuate your feeling lonely and scared.
Work on
becoming the Authentic secure person you are by healing the
insecurities. It is only by aligning to our Authentic Selves
that we can be the whole, loving and divine beings we truly
are.
May your
life be full of love and light,
The Oracle
QUESTION:
Dear
Oracle,
For the
past seven years, I seem to encounter a neighbor that I
dislike intensely. Am I bringing this problem upon myself?
Generally, I get along with people.
Patricia
ANSWER:
Dear Patricia,
It is no coincidence that you have this person as a
neighbor. Although you feel that you generally get along
with people, you clearly have challenges with an issue or
difficulty that comes up with people like your neighbor.
Your neighbor happens to accentuate this difficulty.
Don’t let yourself fall into blame- our egos generally want
to blame another for their imperfections. Your neighbor
undoubtedly could be more considerate or kind towards you,
but no one is perfect so we shouldn’t expect people to
always be thoughtful towards us. Instead, we need to
recognize what is referred to as “God’s winks”, or subtle
communications from life.
Your neighbor represents something in yourself, something
that you have had a hard time seeing, so it is now more
pronounced in your life so that you can take note of this.
Become aware of what part of yourself you see in your
neighbor so that you may change this within yourself. This
is healing work, and when you do this, your relationship
with your neighbor will improve.
May your life
be full of love and light,
The Oracle
QUESTION:
Last October
19, 2003, my husband and the love of my life was killed in an
automobile accident. It is going on a year now and I am still
devastated and can’t find a reason to even want to live. The
children are grown so I am all alone with nothing but my
memories and my pain. I thought with time it would get better
but in ways it seems to get worse because the longer he is gone,
the more I miss him. He was tore up so badly in the accident I
didn’t even get to see him to say a proper goodbye so I got no
closure there. My life is hell and I pray every night to God and
thank him for getting me through another day but beg him to
please not make me face another one. Will I ever get over this
to the point when I wake up in the morning there isn’t this
knife in my heart? How can I go on? Please help me. I am
desperate and have even considered suicide except I can’t bear
to think of putting more pain on my kids and grandkids. That
would be selfish of me. My only hope is my belief in the life
hereafter and that I will see him again but in heaven there
won’t be that kind of love between men and a woman so that kind
of love is lost to me forever. Help me!!!
Rosemary
ANSWER:
Dear Rosemary,
After sharing a life, a romance and a family, it is hard to
say goodbye. Coming to closure is not limited to seeing
someone though: in the world of energy, time does not exist.
This means that if you open to energy, perhaps through
meditation, you can say your goodbyes to your husband
himself.
This is not your real problem though. You have lived long
enough as a wife and his partner so that you have come to
see yourself as these things, not as Rosemary, a spiritual
woman with many things in her life.
When your husband died, what you thought was your life’s
purpose died too. Your experience has now told you that this
is not true, since you are still here and you do have a
purpose. You just need to find it. You need to find your
reason for coming into body and what your gifts are that you
can share with others. When you find your gifts and share
these, you will find that your missing of your husband will
have subsided so that it is manageable; you will also find
your mission to be very fulfilling and rewarding.
At higher vibrations than
the vibrations of life, we are all One. When you tap into
the Oneness and bring it back down to the vibration of life
you will find your husband everywhere you look in life.
This will automatically happen as you find your purpose and
mission in life. Start with your purpose. Your purpose can
be as small as cleaning your home one day and paying your
bills the next. Fulfill your purpose and it will grow. As
your purpose grows, so will your mission and, eventually,
your ability to connect with Oneness.Find new purpose in life.
May your life be full of love and
light,
The Oracle
QUESTION:
Dear
Oracle,
I have
had a problem for sometime now. The thing is I am good at
charming the ladies but when they become interested, I back
down and withdraw only to realize later that it might have
worked. I don’t know if it is because I am scared of being
in a relationship. My other question is how do you know if a
lady loves you? What are the signs because I had this lady
whom I proposed to and she never wanted us to be in a
relationship so I don’t know if she was just testing my
perseverance or something.
Simba
ANSWER:
Hello Simba,
Don’t let yourself be fooled by your ego! You do know when a
woman likes you and when she does not wish to pursue a
relationship. The challenge you are experiencing is a fear
of intimacy. Even though you may long for a relationship,
another part of you avoids one at all costs. It tells you
that you don’t know how to read women so that it withdraws
when they are interested and pursues them when they are not,
making it look like you can’t read them.
Work with your fear of intimacy Simba. The Universal law
says that all things will be equal in our inner worlds and
our outer worlds. This means that you must be intimate with
yourself in order to grow intimacy with others. Start by
getting to know yourself better and you will find it easier
to stay interested in women when women are interested in
you, as you will be increasing intimacy with yourself and
therefore, with others too.
May your
life be full of love and light,
The Oracle
QUESTION:
Dear
Oracle,
I am
married, almost 20 years now. There was never much intimacy.
I still long to have intimacy in my life. Over the years, I
have gone back and forth… on the one hand, I’m thinking God
intended us to enjoy intimacy with a love partner… then at
other times, I am thinking I am wrong thinking I should have
intimacy in my life, that maybe I should be ashamed that at
this later age I shouldn’t have such desires. Five years ago
I met someone and we fell in love. The attraction is strong
and we enjoy intimacy. Yet, I am still back and forth… one
day it seems okay… the next day I am feeling guilty again. I
have never told my husband about this man in my life. We
have never met often, our meetings have always been few and
far apart. I have often wanted to ask for a divorce, but I
truly don’t want to hurt my husband. Though there has been
no real affection, touching and intimacy, he has been a good
step parent to my children, grandchildren and family.
Generous, helpful, caring… as any parent. I appreciate him
so very much. So much so that I feel so guilty thinking of
leaving him for another. It is very frustrating for me, to
try to make a decision, choice, as to whether to stay or
leave. I suffer from depression a lot. I guess maybe at
times, I think I should stay, that there is a lesson in this
for me, perhaps that I would learn that a true relationship
doesn’t have to include sexual intimacy, but it is equally
frustrating in that I still desire very strongly, a sexual
partner, and it isn’t easy dealing with this aspect in my
life and body.
If you
can help me with this dilemma, it would be a blessing.
Thank
you so much,
Want to
do right
ANSWER:
Dear Want to
do Right,
In your
letter you are speaking of two different things – one is
your relationship with your husband that you feel lacks sex
and intimacy; the second is the affair you are having.
First
let’s talk about the affair. You have a great split here
with one half feeling guilty and the other half reaching for
the other man. A split is a terrible thing for us, as it
breaks our energy, practically turning us into two people
and making it almost impossible to do anything in life
whole-heartedly. You will easily recognize why all things
seem so hard for you to do now that your attention has been
brought to it.
Guilt is
a feeling we experience when we have not done right
according to our own morals and values. Your guilt is over
bringing hurt to your husband by the affair.
An
affair is a glorious, wonderful escape of life. It is not
life itself and, like an anesthetic, they may mask our pain
making us feel temporarily wonderful but this is not
reality. An affair offers no life, meaning that there is no
going through the trials and tribulations of life – affairs
are a false high in which we share teenaged excitement and
lust.
Although
this may sound harsh, it is said because during an affair
when we are thinking of leaving our mates we tend to forget
what tends to happen when we switch relationships: the
problems follow us here.
If you
were to divorce and connect with the other man, you will
find this relationship shifting because your needs of him
will go from excitement, escape and understanding to true
relationship needs such as life support, the sharing of and
resolving of real life problems.
As to
your current marriage, one reason you may be having problems
here is because you do not put passion, love and excitement
into this relationship – it goes elsewhere. If you would
like to re-integrate the parts of you that are split, try
focusing on this marriage for a year and see what happens.
Spend a year only connecting with your husband, working to
bring magic and passion here. Be receptive to your husband
by listening to him and being sensitive to his needs. Be
there for him and he will become more intimate with you. Ask
for love, sex and intimacy after you have given to the
relationship for three months. If he is still unable or
willing to have sexual relations, take steps towards solving
this, even if the steps include therapy.
In life
a Universal law states that we can only receive from life
when we give to it. When we are split, as you are, it is
almost impossible for us to give to life and you have not
truly given to either man. Give fully to life, to one man,
and you will then be able to receive fully.
May your
life be full of love and light,
The Oracle
QUESTION:
I have
been married to my soul mate (told by psychic, but knew in
my heart) for 2 years (we are 49 & 50). We first met and
dated when I was 14, he 15 and then had a whirlwind
relationship 2 years ago and got married within 3 months. I
love with all my heart and soul and I know he feels the
same. However, when we fight it is unbelievably abusive.
This doesn’t happen a lot, but enough to make me wonder if
maybe I should let him go, as I feel this marriage is making
us both sick emotionally, physically. Can this be worked out
– is this just a growing phase?
Yogababe
ANSWER:
Dear
Yogababe,
In your
relationship, as in all others, there is a lot of room for
personal growth – though the growth takes different forms.
If both
partners are willing to work on healing themselves, healing
the parts of self that are emotionally and physically
abusive towards one another, then you can grow together.
This will only improve if both partners are willing to grow.
If you
find that there is not the ability to grow and heal, then
you may be forced to prioritize between what you perceive to
be a soul mate and your own emotional and physical health
and well-being.
We
ourselves can always choose to grow – we are never stuck or
in a hopeless situation. There is always the opportunity to
bring light and love into our lives and our life
circumstances, but it requires the necessary changes to
allow these in.
May your
life be full of love and light,
The Oracle

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